Today, we are finishing up our conversation about leadership and communicating expectations. There was one more benefit of clear expectations that we weren’t able to fit in yesterday.
EXPECTATIONS SET UP DIFFICULT CONVERSATIONS WITH LEADERS
When you need to correct a leader (notice we didn’t write “if”), your expectations will serve as an excellent starting point. In relationships, it’s not fair to have hidden expectations, and it’s also not fair when leading others. Be sure to tell your leaders what you expect from their service so you can gently guide them when they wander.
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Give your teenagers a guilt-free, up-close look at materialism. Get free.
Get stripped clean. Get down to nothing but the Cross.
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Let’s use an example; a correcting conversation might look like this, “Hey Jennifer, I wanted to make a comment on some of your joking that I heard tonight. To me, it sounded too critical and condescending, and not the sort of fun conversation that builds and enhances community. Remember last month when we talked about that in the leader meeting? I love laughter as much as anyone, but I want us to be careful that our fun and laughter builds up and not breaks people down. Relationships are essential for our ministry and they’ll only grow when people feel safe.”
Most of us don’t thrive on confrontations and conflict, but when expectations are clear and known, it can make difficult conversations a lot easier.
HERE ARE SOME WAYS TO CREATE GOOD EXPECTATIONS:
1. Focus on the stuff that’s most important for your ministry.
2. Keep them simple. A clear expectation that is understandable is better than one that is cleverly worded. When in doubt, go with clear.
3. Write out the expectations that help move your ministry forward.
4. Get feedback from others.
5. Think about where your leaders need to be, not where they currently are.
6. Some expectations are better when they are general (e.g. Don’t spend a lot of time connecting with other leaders).
7. Some expectations are better when they are really specific (e.g. Tell your students to be back at the van 10 minutes before you need them to be back at the van).
8. Don’t have too few: you want to adequately set your leaders up to be successful.
9. Don’t have too many: you want to keep your leaders from being overwhelmed.
10. Once you’ve finished your first draft, delete all the expectations that relate to situations/problems that probably won’t happen (most often, less is more).
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Give your teenagers a guilt-free, up-close look at materialism. Get free.
Get stripped clean. Get down to nothing but the Cross.
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NOTE: If you aren’t the point person for your youth ministry, you don’t need to wait for your leader to define all the expectations. Take a first crack at creating some expectations for yourself. Offer them as a first draft that he/she can adapt and provide to the rest of the volunteer leadership team. Even if your expectations aren’t used by the ministry leader, you now have a good idea of what “success” looks like for your own ministry to students. When the camp/retreat/event is done, you’ll have a tool to evaluate your ministry and make adjustments to improve.
HOW TO COMMUNICATE YOUR EXPECTATIONS
1. Tell them WHY you have expectations (to set them up to make a great impact).
2. Present them verbally (so people can hear the heart) AND put it in writing so it can be documented and reviewed. Be natural with both.
3. Give lots of examples… mostly positive ones.
4. Allow your leaders the freedom to challenge and ask questions.