I used to have heated arguments with my pastor. Â They were exhausting and painful. Â I remember walking into the church office after a moment of confrontation filled with resentment thinking, “If I ran this church it would be better because I would…” Â All that mindset did was drain me. Â Many times the reason pastors and youth pastors clash is because of a disagreement on decisions, strategies or leadership.
While you may never want to be a pastor you might have some thought and ideas on how it should be done. Â Before you get ready to go off and plant your own church, consider that maybe you need to do a better job of leading up. Â If you ever want your pastor to listen to your ideas and you want toÂ LEAD UP you need to make sure you:
- Offer Encouragement: Your pastor takes on much of the criticism and burden that leading a church will bring. Â It’ll be easy for him to feel defeated and hopeless, you need to be a cheerleader. Â Not only will this give him confidence; but, it will help him see that you are loyal to his leadership. Â Loyalty is often rewarded.
- Practice Obedience: Â As the leader your pastor needs to make decisions. Â Some you’ll agree with and others not so much. Â If you disobey your pastor and constantly undermine his decisions you are showing a lack of trust and signs of arrogance. Showing obedience to your pastor is also a sign of trust in God. Â After all your pastor is in the position he is in because of God. Â While he might not always have it right, your obedience will help you build clout so that you can guide him in the right direction.
- Praise Publicly Confront Privately: Never criticize your pastor publicly. Â When you speak about your pastor in the open you shape people’s perspectives. Â You will not only hurt his image, but the churches and even yours. Â If you have a problem with a decision he’s made or something he’s done confront him privately. Â Set up a meeting where you can chat one on one, so that he’s not embarrassed in front of others.
- ContinuallyÂ Communicate: If you ever want to influence up you need to consistently communicate with your pastor. Â That means being honest with your struggles and letting him know your needs. Â It also requires that you ask your pastor, “How can I serve you?” Â What you are really saying to him is, “How can I help you out?”Â This builds a healthy relationship so that when you are in trouble or in need you have an ally.
The relationship you have with your pastor is going to depend on your personalities. Â Even if you are coming from completely different ends of the earth, you can influence him by earning his respect, trust and loyalty. Â You won’t get your way in ministry if you are knocking him down, disobeying his decisions and making him out to be a bad guy. Â Lead up by showing him you are worth following.
How do you strengthen the relationship you have with your pastor?