EVERYTHING IN YOUTH MINISTRY STARTS HERE

LOGIN | REGISTER TO CONTRIBUTE

Leadership

Neely McQueen has been working with students for nearly 20 years. She currently works in Student Ministries at Overlake Christian Church in Redmond, WA. She wrote 99 Things Every Girl Should Know and contributed on The Simple Truth. Neely is married and has three amazing kids.

A few Wednesday nights ago, things got a bit wild after youth group. We were a little short on volunteers and all of this led to a bit of chaos. I was tired and trying to get everyone out the door…when a student got hurt. I didn’t see it happen and after talking with them I came to the conclusion that he was fine. The parents did not come to the same conclusion. Bummer.

By the end of the night I realized I had made a mistake. In fairness, the student was fine, but I should have contacted the parents and let them know what had happened so that they weren’t alarmed when he got home.

I hate making mistakes. I have intense internal dialogue with myself when I make a mistake. I try to rationalize my decision followed by berating myself for being such a failure. Safe to say…both of these are not healthy ways to handle making mistakes.

We all make mistakes. But there is a better way.

When the internal dialogue begins in my head, here’s what I do:

Embrace my imperfection. Plain and simple, I am not perfect and I will make mistakes. These mistakes don’t define me…they are just part of the growing process. I am trying to not be the youth workers who acts (or believes) like I have it all together and that I have arrived at perfection.

Own it. Confess it and make it quick. The longer I have the internal dialogue over a mistake big or small…without fail it turns into a HUGE mistake…at least in my head. When I confess it and admit my mistake and make amends, the mistake loses power over me and the dialogue has to come to an end. Confessing may be to multiple people…supervisor, parent, or student…in doing so, I am “owning” up to my imperfections.

Learn from it. I try really hard after I make a mistake to ask myself, “What would I do differently?” or “What did I learn?” I don’t want to keep making the same mistakes over and over again. While embracing my imperfections, I still strive to grow and be better than I was the day before. Learning from my mistakes seems to make them less of a mistake…at least for me.

By Thursday after the incident I had spoken with all involved and made amends for my mistake. It was a bit painful and embarrassing…but again I was surprised by grace from those around me. I like surprises…especially ones covered in grace.

Neely /@neelym

Leave a Comment

Please keep in mind that comments are moderated and rel="nofollow" is in use. So, please do not use a spammy keyword or a domain as your name, or it will be deleted. Let us have a personal and meaningful conversation instead.

  • VIEW ARTICLES BY CATEGORY

  • RECOMMENDED RESOURCES

       

    DOWNLOAD A FREE YOUTHMINISTRY.com eBOOK NOW!

    FREE DIGITAL GAME BOOK FULL OF INDOOR GAME IDEAS

    CLICK HERE