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Chuck Bomar planted and is Lead Pastor of Colossae Church in Portland, Oregon and is founder of both CollegeLeader (www.CollegeLeader.org) and iampeople (www.iampeople.org). He is author of 8 books, including the highly anticipated releases of Better Off Without Jesus and Losing Your Religion. When he is not traveling the country speaking at conferences or consulting with church or denominational leaders, he is home with his family, the place he loves to be more than any other. Chuck and his wife, Barbara, have three beautiful daughters: Karis, Hope and Sayla.

Screen Shot 2014-02-24 at 5.36.11 PMThere’s no question that cultivating inter-generational relationships is an obstacle many churches are seeking to overcome. We can get people from different generations to sit in the same room at the same time, but this doesn’t mean they are “connecting.”  If we desire to cultivate inter-generational relationships, we must ingrain at least the following 5 values into the culture of our churches. Here they are and some thoughts about each one:

  1. Value of Family.  We cannot alienate people by language. When we speak of “family” we ought to focus on our theological family more than nuclear structures so that we do not alienate singles, college age people, or children who unwillingly find themselves in a broken home. The bottom line is healthy nuclear families are not an end, they are a means to an end.
  2. Value of Responsibility.  We must help older believers understand their responsibility to invest in younger people.  We cannot consider ourselves successful in ministry if we don’t focus on this. The bottom line is measuring faithfulness in ministry must include how we hold people accountable to the standards of scripture.
  3. Value of Others.  We must help people embrace the call of the gospel to focus on others, first.  If people think their faith is about them they will then think the church exists for them and thus will not interact inter-generationally unless they feel like it benefits them. However, a gospel-centered person seeks to give community to others before seeking it for themselves.
  4. Value of Quality.  We must begin finding ways to measure quality of relationships. We typically only measure quantitative elements in ministry. Churches that are helping cultivate inter-generational relationships are finding ways to measure quality. The bottom line is measuring quantity is not necessarily a sign of success for spiritual leaders.
  5. Value of Difference.  We must embrace our unique differences, but also value the differences of others (personality, giftedness, etc) to the point where we intentionally pursue those different from us. Churches have traditionally structured around affinity because we are inherently attracted to those just like us anyway.  However, embracing the value of difference would lead to us to also structuring toward diversity.  I’ve found that if we structure to promote and protect diversity, affinity naturally happens.  But if we only structure around affinity we tend to lose the beauty of diversity, which ultimately leads to generational disconnection.

Chuck / @chuckbomar

2 COMMENTS

  • […] Bomar wrote, “Cloudy with a Chance of Connections.” Bomar shares 5 values that he believes need to be ingrained in the culture of churches: […]

  • […] Bomar wrote, “Cloudy with a Chance of Connections.” Bomar shares 5 values that he believes need to be ingrained in the culture of churches: […]

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